Splashing Into The Fluorescent Madness Of ‘Splatoon 3’

August 6, 2026 - 10:11

I finally caved and picked up Splatoon 3, and honestly, I should have done it way sooner. Everyone is talking about the new Splatoon Raiders spin-off, but I figured I needed to see where the whole ink-splatting craze actually started before jumping into the latest loot-driven twist. Turns out, that was the right call.

The game drops you into a world that looks like a rave threw up on a skate park. Fluorescent greens, hot pinks, and electric blues cover every surface, and your only job is to paint as much of it as possible. It sounds simple, but the chaos is real. You are not just shooting enemies. You are swimming through your own ink, popping up behind rivals, and trying to keep your team's color on top while the other side does the exact same thing to you.

What got me is how fast it all moves. One minute you are carefully covering a corner, and the next you are in a three-way firefight with rollers and chargers flying everywhere. The motion controls take a bit of getting used to, but once they click, you feel like you are actually in the middle of a paint-soaked warzone.

The single-player campaign is a nice break too. It is weird, funny, and full of levels that make you think instead of just shoot. But the real draw is the multiplayer. Every match feels fresh, even when you lose. And you will lose a lot. But that is part of the fun.

If you have been sleeping on this series like I was, do yourself a favor. Splatoon 3 is pure, messy joy. Just be ready to have your screen look like a tie-dye explosion by the end of the night.